Have you ever wondered if you’re living out the fate of your ancestors – an ancestral repeating pattern? Maybe you’ve noticed the same kinds of relationships, career setbacks, or emotional struggles repeating across generations. No matter how hard you try to change, the ancestral patterns persist. Is it a coincidence—or is something deeper unfolding beneath the surface?
Do We Inherit the Fate of Our Ancestors?
By Anuradha Dayal-Gulati
Ancestral Patterns
The truth is, we don’t just inherit eye color or habits from our parents and grandparents—we also inherit their energy. Their emotions, unresolved experiences, and even their pain all live on in the family’s energetic field. You are, in many ways, a living extension of their stories.
I once worked with a woman named Carol, who came to me to work through her anxiety. Our sessions often touched on her daughter, Marianna, a passionate and bold thinker who wasn’t afraid to challenge norms in her nonprofit job. One day, Carol arrived in tears—Marianna had just been fired. Her project had stirred resistance, and despite her determination, it cost her the job.
What struck me was how familiar this sounded. Carol herself had gone through something similar years before, pushing for necessary change at her hospital job, only to face backlash and lose opportunities. As we talked, I asked, “Do you think Marianna might be repeating your story?”
Carol paused. “I never thought of it that way… but yes, she probably learned that from me.”
Digging deeper, we uncovered that Carol’s father had also been pushed out of the very business he founded, for being too forward-thinking. The same pattern of “pushing for change and paying the price” had repeated across three generations. A coincidence? Perhaps. But then Carol added something else: Marianna lost her job on her grandfather’s birthday.
Moments like that aren’t just interesting—they’re meaningful. Carl Jung referred to these synchronicities—events that appear unrelated yet carry profound significance. The universe often speaks through patterns and timing. Are we paying attention?
These Ancestral patterns—whether emotional, behavioral, or situational—are part of what I call family energy fields. They’re real, and they’re powerful. They may show up as repeated heartbreak, fear of abundance, self-sabotage, or even a tendency toward hypercriticism. Sometimes, you might notice you’re in a different relationship but playing out the same old dynamic, with the roles reversed.
At other times, it’s not about behavior, but about experience: a grandfather betrayed by a business partner, followed by his son and grandson enduring similar betrayals. These repeating experiences aren’t random. They’re invitations to heal something that hasn’t yet been resolved.
Many people call this family karma—the emotional and energetic legacy passed down through generations. Some call it a “family curse.” I prefer to think of it as a message: something unhealed that wants to be seen, acknowledged, and transformed.
But this isn’t about blame—it’s about awareness.
The moment you recognize that a pattern may not be yours alone, you begin to open the door to change.
You start to ask new questions:
- Where does this feeling really come from?
- Who else in my family carried this fear, this grief, this scarcity mindset?
- Am I living my life or reliving someone else’s?
By becoming curious and conscious, you start making new choices. You no longer have to repeat what’s familiar just because it’s inherited.
In my own life, I have noticed how deeply ingrained these patterns can be. For years, I resisted planning vacations too far in advance. It gave me anxiety. At first, I brushed it off as a personal quirk. But over time, I realized that this stemmed from my childhood—my parents rarely made plans due to my father’s unpredictable schedule. That uncertainty had quietly shaped how I approached time, travel, and even joy.
You might carry similar patterns without knowing. Or might be frugal out of fear, not practicality. You might hold back in life not because you lack ability, but because you’ve inherited a story of not-enoughness.
But here’s the empowering truth:
Once you see the pattern, you can begin to change it. Awareness is the first step toward liberation—not just for you, but for those who came before you and those who will come after.
So next time something in your life feels familiar in an uncomfortable way, pause. Look at it. Ask if it might belong to someone else in your lineage. And then, gently but firmly, choose a different path.
After all, we’re not just here to live—we’re here to evolve.
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About the Author
Anuradha Dayal-Gulati is a transformational coach and energy practitioner with a Ph.D. in economics. After a career in academia and finance, she now helps others break free from past patterns and reclaim their power. She specializes in family constellation work and flower essence therapy. Learn more at floweressencehealing.com.
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