When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.
Question:
I wonder if the laws of Karma are holding me back from finding love. When I was 16, I fell in love and we were in love, inseparable for three years, even though my parents were against it and did everything to break us up. He was a good, devoted friend and we really had a great time together. After about three years, I decided I was not in love anymore, I started feeling that he was not intellectually my equal and generally stopped feeling in love and became bored. I soon met another guy, who I thought was very sexy and intellectually stimulating and fell in love with him and broke up with my first love. He was devastated, but I was cold and told him I did not love him anymore, which was the way I felt.
The new guy turned out to be bad news and treated me horribly. Needless to say that ended. Many years have passed, I have since married, had a child and divorced. Since my divorce, I have learned a lot, became a better person, and in general am ready and open to really love someone.
My question is, was that first love the only happy love in my life? Is my Karma punishing me for breaking his heart? I feel that it was the only happy relationship where I was really in love and really loved. Is there hope that I could love again and be loved? What can I do?
Response:
I doubt very much that your current love life has anything to do with your breakup with your teenage boyfriend. What it does show is that you still feel guilty about it and that you see your lack of a relationship as punishment from your past. You have extended this to the point of wondering if you could ever be loved again.
First of all, you need to recognize that evaluation of your worth is utterly wrong.Your worth and value comes from your Being, not past actions. Start a spiritual practice that gives you direct experience of your true self. That will provide a foundation for what is valuable, real, and lovable about you. This experience will prepare you for a meaningful and loving relationship.
Love,
Deepak
