As for my experience with Outer Planet People, I think in many ways I also don’t quite fit society’s standards even though I am an IPP / NPP (Inner / Natal Planet Person). I don’t know if it’s because water signs in general tend to be incompatible in many ways with modern / mainstream society, especially if they’re people who show very typical Cancer / Scorpio / Pisces traits. I like to share my feelings and discuss deeper things, yet I feel so much of the modern world is about numbing your feelings and just plowing through. I really admire the writers, philosophers, astrologers etc. of the past, and today I felt a sense of sadness because modern society seems to be all about money and “success.” People either don’t dwell, or are conditioned into not dwelling in their feelings too much because they’re told to just keep moving forward. I don’t handle the complexities of modern life well, and things such as social networking disgust me to the core because it’s **** superficial.
On the other hand, the Cancer / Capricorn and the Saturn in me gives me many needs that align with convention. I want to get married and have kids, and I know I don’t have any grand plan or ambition. I’m a family man at heart but coming from a background of emotional abuse and manipulation (OK, I’ll now tell the truth, that “relative” of mine with Mars-Pluto opposition is my mom) and having divorced parents (my dad’s chart is predominantly earth-Taurus Sun, Moon, Venus, Aries Mercury, Mars in Virgo, but he has multiple Uranus, Neptune, and 1-2 Pluto aspects to his natal planets) makes me long for a home and a sense of security even more strongly. I try to put up a wall by seeming happy-go-lucky (Sagittarius ascendant) and being intellectual (Aquarius moon), but deep down there’s this sense of loss and longing for security and finding a home in both a person and a place. I keep trying to tell myself that whatever’s happened has happened, but do you know how ******* (excuse my language) ENVIOUS I am when I see people who have happy families that they can actually bond with, who really care about them and give a ****?
I know I can never be truly “Uranian” or “Neptunian” and be “in-tune” with the collective consciousness and truly forget about the “self” because there’s always a point where Saturn pulls me back, and being a Cancer I’m looking for home, for roots. I can pretend I’m intellectual, but I’m a pseudo-intellectual at best. I don’t actually like heavy mental activity. I can try to be Neptunian / Piscean and have religious or spiritual inclinations, I’ve experimented with religion but found it’s not “me” / for me. For me the angular houses 1, 4, and 7 are stressed (no 10, 10th house is completely empty), I feel like my sense of purpose is small, yet significant. It is to re-define, and to establish new patterns and a new order with regards to self, to family, and to marriage and committed relationships, to end the cycle of abuse I’ve been subjected to and create new and true roots for myself and for my children (when I have them). The sacrifice I have to make, and what I have to accept is that I’ll never be able to truly bond with my family of origin because they’re of a fundamentally incompatible energy.
I’m definitely more a Water / Earth person, I don’t feel that “fire” in me compared to fire signs and I’m not truly air because I realize what really guides me are emotions and I have a very hard time dealing with people who give logical and detached responses. I tend to drown myself in pity, and sometimes I can “feel” the energy a person emanates without really telling you why. Sometimes it gets to the point where I feel physical discomfort when I’m around someone I don’t like. Mars-Pluto represents a dark, scheming, and unpredictable energy that is mutually destructive for both the person who has the energy (and doesn’t know how to wield it) and those being exposed to the energy. Sometimes very graphic videos give me physical discomfort, it’s like I can feel some of the pain, albeit just a bit of it.
I have a very indirect approach to many things, and I can get so attached so quickly that I don’t even know what I’m really doing. I tend to be sympathetic, sometimes a bit too much that I overextend myself, yet I can also be very cautious and overly so. I tend to care a bit too much and assume a position of service / submissiveness by default. It’s not easy for me as I am always looking to serve, even to sacrifice. Not an expressive guy, I do more than I say but I’m definitely more “Mr. Nice Guy” than not.
You know what I believe the world needs more than anything else? Simplicity and more honesty. People need to be more in tune with feelings, with simple comforts. People need to be honest about how they truly feel and to know it’s OK to be in touch with their emotional side. If they hate something, to hell with it. Stop holding it back and pretending everything’s OK. I feel like the whole world functions on suppression, on masks and assumed identities if you know what I mean. However, I also feel conflicted as I say this because….. I guess part of me is still conventional, and how many of us can truly be brave enough to reveal ourselves 100%, at all times?
I feel a need to care, to bond, to nurture, not in a “Neptunian” or “Plutonian” way where two merge with each other to become one (as much as I wish I could), but in a more down-to-earth way. Along with this need to care, bond, and nurture is a resistance to change. I want to be appreciated for what I do, but I don’t appreciate it when people want to change me into someone I’m not and use rules, dogma, or external pressure. I tend to be attracted to people who want my presence in their life and who don’t want want to change me fundamentally, but are more worldly wise, more able to cope with life, and perhaps encourage me to take some risks I normally wouldn’t. I’d likely feel secure with a person like that though it still takes time for me to truly open up.
I don’t want this reply to start sounding too much like a monologue, so I’ll get back to the topic. There’s something about the planetary energy of each of the outer planets that unsettles me, yet I find them curious. Uranus can be so innovative and unconventional that it disturbs my need for predictability and consistency. Neptune has so much love and compassion for all, yet I can’t help but feel that it means a lack of compassion and warmth on a personal level. I firmly believe one should care for their own house, that the building blocks of a society should be intimate relationships, especially couples and the nuclear family unit. Pluto is about sex, death, power, survival, and transformation. Anything related to power and manipulation makes me extremely nervous. I admit there are times where I’ve been subtly manipulative of other people (especially a few years ago when I was emotionally much less stable than I am now), but my manipulation was for the sake of reassurance or a not-so-complex need for security, but Pluto is power and manipulation with the intent of utter destruction and transformation that can get very dark. Put Mars in the mix and you have a midnight inferno. Those of you with one of the Mars-Pluto aspects that have posted in this thread, IMO, are at a point where you’re aware of how this energy affects you and those around you, but I think 99% don’t and bring much suffering to both themselves and to others.
With regards to Outer Planet People, part of me is very fascinated by these trans-personal energies because they represent something greater such as possibilities, while the inner or natal planets all represent definitions and limits in one way or another. Part of me wishes I could be more in-tune with these trans-personal energies, yet part of me wants to inject a sense of “gravity” and routine into the lives of these people that I often do because I genuinely want to care about them and worry about them. It’s a love-hate relationship. Not sure if this is related to OPPs, but sometimes there are individuals whom I really feel a sense of caring and responsibility towards, it’s like I worry about some things in their life more than themselves do.
These people often tend to be women whom I feel a motherly / sisterly attachment to. They often aren’t much, much older than me, but if I know they’re struggling in some way it just heightens my desire to care for them and play a nurturing role in their life. If they’re also caring towards me, as times goes on I feel a strong physical, mental, and emotional attachment that could lead to love. I just want to be there for them, I don’t care if I’m not playing a traditionally masculine role, I’m a straight guy but subconsciously sometimes I feel like it’s two women bonding with each other. I like being looked after, and I also feel a need to nurture and to serve but it’s almost always in a more feminine way. I’m more likely to picture myself washing a woman’s feet, to make sure she is fed and nourished at the end of a day (just for two examples) rather than picturing myself as the guy who goes out and makes a lot of money to buy a house and gadgets. When I’m around guys who talk a lot about patriarchal, very “man” stuff I tend to fall silent and withdraw because I know that’s not who I am. I don’t see what’s wrong with raising children, in essence, by two mothers except one is a mother disguised as a dad. Don’t like being dead weight in a relationship, I feel the need to contribute but I get uncomfortable when I’m forced / pressured to do it in a way that requires lots of exposure to different kinds of politics.
Not sure how many of you realize this but Pluto’s essence is, in many ways, a very masculine one with themes that have, throughout much of history, been associated with men. It’s definitely the most “worldly” out of the impersonal planets if you really think about some of the things it governs. A lot of it is Scorpio energy (and often the negative attributes), but the planetary energy by itself. I mean, it’s so far from the luminaries and shrouded in secrecy. We don’t know that much about it.
